Archive for October, 2009

Ghostwriter Agreement

Thursday, October 29th, 2009

The following is a generic Ghostwriter-Client Agreement or Contract that I've used over the years. Since I'm slowly working my way out of this business, I'm sharing all my secrets with you. Have fun with it. My wish for you is lots of great work! Sincerely, William Dean A. Garner Me Cool Ghostwriter 1234 Pullman Lane Beverly Hills, CA 90210 Phone: 800.555.5678 E-mail: me@coolghostwriter.com DD MM YYYY Mr. XXX 1234... »

Posted in Business, Entertainment, Fiction, Ghostwriting, Publishing, Writing | No Comments »

Scientific Fact: Fox News is 53.7% Useless Noise

Wednesday, October 28th, 2009

Over a three-day period, I recorded Fox News in the morning over a span of five minutes, during which it featured at least three members of the news team. To be accurate in my assessment of Fox News, I used a spectrum analyzer to tease apart the various voice frequencies and came upon an interesting fact: 46.3% of the time,... »

Posted in Absurd, Cable News, Fox News! | No Comments »

Richard C. Holbrooke: An Open Letter to You, Homes

Tuesday, October 27th, 2009

Dear Mr. Holbrooke: I've read with great dismay your handling of the Matthew Hoh Affair. Here's my take, something I shared recently with friends in Afghanistan, those who really know what's going on there: "We’re all going YAWN. The silly media manipulate what people should read and hear. I think they feel we’re too stupid to think for ourselves, and the parents... »

Posted in Absurd, Afghanistan, Military, US Government | No Comments »

Freedom, Redefined by Comrade Obama

Friday, October 23rd, 2009

Freedom has been redefined by Socialist President, Comrade Obama: FREE-radical DOMination, meaning that the "free radical" Obama, i.e. the man who oxidizes our freedoms, is out to dominate the world with his socialist agenda. STOP FREE-radical DOMination Now Before It Oxidizes You, Too. . .... »

Posted in Absurd, US Government | No Comments »

The Oxidation of Freedom by the Free Radical Obama

Friday, October 23rd, 2009

More beautiful than a buckeyball, as evanescent as a carbene molecule, FREEDOM is the rarest molecular structure in the Universe. It requires a continuous struggle against the inexorable forces of chaos, a neverending fight against the demons of entropy, and a day in-day out battle against evil itself--those who oppose freedom. The Free Radical, Comrade Obama, is now about to sign away... »

Posted in Absurd, Climate Change, Science, US Constitution, US Government | No Comments »

Books! Books! Books! Who’s Qualified to Set the “Right” Price?

Wednesday, October 21st, 2009

What's a good book worth to you? Thirty dollars? Ten dollars? A buck? When you read a great novel or work of nonfiction, do you consider what the author slaved through to share her thoughts with you, to edit and polish her best work so you could enjoy 15 hours of entertainment? Do you care that she invested 1,000 hours... »

Posted in Books, Business, Entertainment, Fiction, Lifestyle, Media, New York Times, Publishing, Writing | No Comments »

Obama on Climate Change: “As Your New God, I Shall Change the Laws of Physics!”

Tuesday, October 20th, 2009

You've heard it all before: Obama is the new God and he's on a warpath of change. Change this, change that; ne'er ponder the consequences or whether change was necessary to begin with. Change is good! Sounds like Gordon Gecko's "Greed is good" speech to shareholders of a company he was about to take over . . . and then dismantle,... »

Posted in Absurd, Climate Change, Laws of Physics | No Comments »

Become a Roman Catholic Today: 75% Off All New Memberships!

Tuesday, October 20th, 2009

Things are tough over at Vatican, Inc.: membership is waaay down since the Spanish Inquisition, morale is getting kinda low since the introduction of laws against pedophilia, and the Collections Department has resorted to buying coffers that're 50% smaller but that come with frilly pretty things to make them appear as large as before (and they're still not near capacity... »

Posted in Absurd, Religion | No Comments »

The Grand Manipulation of America

Tuesday, October 20th, 2009

All the news networks carry pretty much the same messages, just packaged slightly differently. When one network, say, Fox News challenges the president on various issues and gets slapped around by the White House, what happens to those challenges? I mean, really, what becomes of those vociferous allegations from seemingly smart, thinking people? Do these people follow up on them... »

Posted in Brzezinski, Fox News!, Media, US Government | No Comments »

The Differences Between Our Elected Government and Our Military

Saturday, October 17th, 2009

The following is my response to negative comments about an open letter by the US Army's 3rd Brigade, 10th Mountain Division's commanding officer,  Colonel David B. Haight, who wrote a very touching missive, an open letter to all his troops. The letter can be found here: http://www.usatoday.com/news/military/2009-10-15-letter_N.htm Let us not forget the differences between our elected government and our military: it... »

Posted in Military, Politics, US Government, Uncategorized | No Comments »

Hot NOW

Thermopower Waves: A New Form Of Electrical Power

By William Dean A. Garner

Stuff We're Familiar With Bend or deform a particular type of crystal and it generates electricity. Pull off a sticky piece of masking tape and it... »

Other Stories

Publishing Dates

October 2009
S M T W T F S
« Sep   Nov »
 123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031